He always chooses his brother or mother to make life decisions… I am never included on big decisions. I’m so lonely and just a wreck. My husband and l has been married almost five years. I wonder if it’s because I’m so used to hearing it, or that I don’t want to entertain his behavior towards me. It’s tough but keep trying. Just feel like it’s too far gone as we both seem to prefer to not be around each other. I’ve been married to my 2nd husband for 10 years and with him a total of 15 years. I have been telling him for the past few weeks if this doesn’t change I want a divorce. I told him idk what to do anymore, I try not say anything and I still get yelled at. I started making time for myself. Make you time. We are on vacation in another country and were on the bus. Simply having a father in the house isn’t enough. We hardly do anything together and when I suggest ideas sometimes he never goes for it. He doesn’t care that he hurts me, even when I tell him he does. Please pray for me – I have been in my 2nd abusive marriage since June 16, 1984 and I don’t know how to get out of it financially (my husband is financially abusive as well). I’m a horrible business person etc etc etc..he has told me he is so ashamed of me i might as well put a gun to my head and sadly i actually contemplated it. She is a domineering woman who raised both of her children to remain dependent on her. I rub his back when he asks me to and I do everything I can to make sure he knows that I appreciate him. A game, people. The truth is that there IS somewhere to go, and help is available. I was on drugs and so was he when I made that mistake and now have been sober for 8 years. Otherwise I would leave him. He is so abusive manipulative. In short, he demanded a prenuptial which stated neither one of us is financially responsible for the other’s home. I’ve raised him from birth and am in torment as to where he is. Staying positive is hard even in the best of times; when you’re pregnant it feels impossible. He apologizes and then goes back to the same thing. He recently lost his job and made it clear that I have to find a way to pay for my own car and my house (if I choose to keep it). It’s all CRAP all TALK. He asked if I still wanted to go to our destination because I’m quiet. “I have no where to go and no help or money. Ok my husband is not physically abusive although he has squeezed and walked me out of rooms but I have been through much trauma since an early age both parents passed by age 11 sister left me with her abusive husband age13 moved with another sister differant state (I’m American indian) all white community where I was picked on bullied to the point I felt unwanted and out of place no self esteem no confidence turned angry mean and got into many physical fights got pregnant at 17 married at 18 was physically n verbally abused cheated on and divorced by 21 but drilled it in my head Noone would ever treat me this way again turned to alcohol and used it to cope with everything ended up in lots of trouble over the years on my 3rd marriage found my friend dead my brother killed by train my sister froze in the Mountains homeless got into meth at 29 my son committed suicide at 19 I was 39 my dad also suicide when I was 9 I attempted it 3 times I believe most woman are home untrustworthy and sneaky and will sleep with your man and althought I never been alone n singel men will cheat and are sneaky at everything they do I don’t believe they are trustworthy and will cheat n lie while I’m being talked about and looked at like what a fool so I have major trust issues and make accusations about cheating almost every day and say I’m the only woman that has selfrespect morals,values,and the most honest loyal woman you will ever meet yet I don’t know how to stop self sabotage I love and show my love so genuinely and I want to feel loved the way I show love but what I call communication telling my husband what he don’t do anymore that he has cheated but I also have found many woman’s clothe hair strands pictures of scratches bite marKS audio of whispers and sex moans aND a husband that has no reaction or empathy for what I feel has happened and accused him of cheating and he doesn’t show me affection or compliment me won’t talk about what I feel and says he not arguing with me and is cold hearted never ever gives in gives me the silent treatment acts like he has no care but yet tells me he loves me but won’t fight for the marriage he says I belittle him with what I say about the things he no longer does I call it communication I understand I disrespect him by accusations and not trusting and believing what he says but I get no help and trying to figure out how all these females clothing under garments get in my home garage I can’t stop accusations cuz he makes me feel he has had affairs but says it is all in my head I need help and yet a frind thinks the same of his wife and he talks to him about their deal and agrees with what he says with item or assumptions he has of his wife he always says I will never leave and I don’t want to I made my vown through god this last time and want to believe he gave him to me for life but so much has happened it’s a toxuc relationship but I feel he is right I caused it all in my own head and I’m self inflciting from all my past but then I just want to leave so that I may find the man that understands me and helps me instead of keeping score and only emotion he shows is hid cold heart I just don’t know what to do